Canada Speaks: January 2010: Drek Daa

My New Year's Resolution

by Drek Daa

So it’s time for my new year’s resolution. I love new year’s resolutions.

The first things I’m going to do, comes January first, is leave Winnipeg and move to Gabriola Island.

Then I will quit smoking. I can’t wait. Imagine my lungs clear and breath fresh.

I will also cut down on coffee. Yes, way too much caffeine in my life, sending me up and down on this roller coaster ride.

And of course I’ll cut down on booze, and drugs, and pornography, and computer games, and self-mutilation, and casual sex, and also my mayonnaise fetish.

And I am also planning to get a job, and cut up my credit cards, and consolidate my debts, and I’ll start all fresh. I’ll find myself a date, and everything will be so great in this new year! I can’t wait! Wow, it’s gonna be great!

In the New Year, I will exercise every second day, and I’ll lose some weight. I’ll get a haircut, and pluck my eyebrows, and clip my toenails, and I’ll dress all up, and go out, to poetry readings, and the symphony, and dance shows. I’ll go for regular walks in the park. I’ll bicycle more, and drive less, and recycle, and be aware, and have compassion and stuff.

Plus I’ll clean my place, and start reading books, and drink less coke and more water, and eat three healthy meals a day, and maybe even write down my dreams or something else that makes sense, and publish it all somewhere, like in Gabriola Sounder.

And then I’ll learn to sing, and take some sculpture classes, and yoga, and tai-chi, and just be all so Buddhist that the old arbutus trees on my beach will go ‘Wow, he is so Buddhist.’

I will just simply be.

And I will stop beating myself up, and stop being angry with my mom and dad. And I’ll find a friend, and find beauty in the most ordinary of places. And I’ll stare into the stars for hours at a time, and be all so happy and easy and intelligent and fine that even the stars will get surprised and say ‘Wow, he is so happy and easy and intelligent and fine. We wouldn’t have thought when we saw him last year.’

I can’t wait for the new year to come. Can’t wait. Can’t wait. I am getting impatient. I am getting more impatient. There is still a few days left. Why is time dragging its tail? All this waiting is making me nervous. Oh, gee, I feel so stuck in this old old old year. It stinks, it hurts, it’s bad, so sad? I feel I am getting mad, hrrr, and I do not want to get mad on the air. 

So I think I need to go, have a drink, and maybe a smoke, to take the edge off …

Darek Dawda (aka Drek Daa)is a poet, songwriter, CBC columnist, and psychotherapist. He moved to Canada from Poland in 1990, and now lives in Winnipeg.